by redvultureblacksaffron

Does anyone else find that they can’t work at their altar when they’re sick?

For the past couple of weeks I’ve been terribly ill with…something. I suspect that, in part, it’s the result of the worst allergies I’ve had in years. I can’t even walk up the street without huffing along and my stomach is close to rejecting every damn thing I put in it. I’m going to the doctor today so hopefully she will have some insight as to what I should do. I have taken tums, benadryl, claritin, IBS meds, Alka Selzer, all to no avail. 

Anyway the point is, when I feel like crap my godphone gets completely scrambled. Suddenly everything I think I’m feeling and hearing is negative. What I would consider my genuine experiences with the gods are almost always positive or neutral (say, when they’re busy doing other shit and feel distant) so when this happens I know to step away. It’s frustrating though because I love communing with Them and want to keep up my structured, ritualized evenings. 

Also as I may have mentioned I went to visit my very elderly grandparents which brought up a lot of my feelings around death, which I will get to in a later post. I still have the project I am working on for Osiris, which I need to get my ass in gear on. It’s just that trying to find a single grave in a graveyard of over 7k is a little daunting.